- I was sexually abused by a baby sitter when I was 11 years old. At the time I found it tremendously exciting, as it allowed me to physically express my nascent attraction for the male body, but I no longer view the incident in such a positive light.
- When I was seven years old I became obsessed with Robin Hood, to the point where I wanted to only wear green, and I made a cardboard reproduction of his gravestone, which I stood at the head of my bed and slept under. Morbid, much?
- When suffering from bouts of depression, I lose all appetite, to the point where trying to swallow food makes me physically ill. Thankfully I haven't suffered a major bout of depression for seven years.
- My middle name is Leigh, after Vivian Leigh, who played Scarlet O'Hara in Gone with the Wind.
- My hair started going grey when I was 17; now even my chest hair is going grey, as if I was a silverback gorilla in reverse.
- I high school I was beaten up on at least a weekly basis between Year 7 and Year 10; it only stopped when I scored the lead role in our inaurgural musical production, and the thugs I went to school with grudgingly realised that although I was a freak, I was not, perhaps, completely useless.
- At the very moment my mum received the phone call telling her my uncle, her older brother, had died from pancreatic cancer, I was outside jerking off with my straight best friend.
- The first piece of artwork I ever owned is a pottery owl, purchased for me by my parents when I was about seven or eight. I still own it; its looking down at me from atop my desk as I type this, a Van Gogh self-portrait postcard I purchased in Amsterdam leaning against it.
Saturday, June 23, 2007
I've been tagged
It seems that d.u.p has tagged me with another meme. The theme this time is to detail eight things about me that you don't know. Given the tendancy I have to be so frank on this blog, I don't know if there's much left to put out, but I'll try...
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7 comments:
Point 1 is interesting Richard -- its "don't talk about these" type of things. I can add these for you Richard, although they might be well known.
9. I like big hairy guys, and always have.
10. I used to pretend to dislike that aweful game AFL.
Conrad - it was never a pretence, honestly! I used to loathe football - a hangover from being beaten up in school with monotomous regularity by the footy yobs - and it wasn't until I was actually taken to a game in about 1987-88 that I discovered the joy of the game, as seperate from what I associated the game with. Does that makes sense?
And as to point one - I've spent literally decades not talking about it, so it's damn well time to start. *hug*
It makes perfect sense Richard --actually, that may now provide some explanation of point 11 which I just dug up from my memory:
11. I once gave a recital about a poem that I wrote that was about how much I dislike the word "mate".
I remember thinking how much I agreed with the sentiment of that poem, although I also wondered why it was that if you big blokey guys, why you would dislike this word, as the word "mate" must surely be the stereotype word for this type of guy. I presume it is also the stereotype word for the typical type of person that feels obliged to bother everyone else also (including you).
Reading these points, I find it a little bit sad it seems that harassment of gay guys (or in fact, any one slightly different), seems to have occurred with such consistency. It's also unfortunate that it appears to occur everywhere I go -- I have some friends in both France and Hong Kong that have not dissimilar stories.
One of the odd things is that somehow or other the stereotype seems to get reversed to some extent in the eyes of many females later in life. Meterosexual and the French equivalent seem relatively popular. Oddly enough the cutesy-soft gay stereotype (quite different to the Meterosexual) also seems popular in Hong Kong (and even moreso Taiwan), which I assume is due to the emphasis of cutesy-culture (I think its origin is from Japan). So many people to be dissapointed later in life. Gay guys wanting buff guys, and women wanting gay stereotypes.
Great meme Mr Watts, very touching.
I can relate to the beatings, Richard. And as you pointed out, Conrad, it's not just gay guys, but anyone arty or different. In my case, I was an ardent individualist, and refused to conform to or obey group codes. I wasn't beaten regularly, though that was there on occasions. Mostly it was a form of terrorisation, the fear that a bashing would occur. School toilets were a place of dread. I wonder whether anything has changed.
People thought I was gay (I'm not - don't hold that against me). My son was arty and individualist and some of his peers may have thought he was gay. I don't think he was. In fact, I'm pretty sure he wasn't. He committed suicide just before Xmas, and when I was around his age I also had suicidal thoughts. It saddens me immensely to read your post, Richard, and wonder what can be done to prevent this kind of culture.
Very touching Richard.
Once I started getting the lead in the school musical, the bullying stopped for me too.
How bizarre...
Paul - I would hope that, little by little, our culture is changing, although the recent media focus on bullying makes me fear that even while some things change (ie acceptance of same-sex attracted youth) other things haven't.
And as you and Conrad both point out, homophobia affects all men, even straight guys. The assumption that difference = queer = wrong is something that I hope can be weeded out of our culture over time, although given that so much of secondary school is about homogenity, not individuality, I can't say I'm wildly optimistic.
Hi Rick! *hug*
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